Saturday, October 1, 2011
Friday, September 30, 2011
Jokes!!!
A wife says to her friend, "Our sex life stinks." Her friend says, "Do you ever watch your husband's face when you're having sex?" She says, "Once, and I saw rage." Her friend says, "Why would he be angry during sex?" The wife says, "Because he was looking through the window at us."
Bear gobbles up pies at B.C. pizza joint
CALGARY - Andrea Lawrance is used to customers having growling tummies.
But this unexpected visitor had a bear-size case of the munchies.
Lawrance was washing dishes at Fat Tony's Pizza in Whistler, B.C. Monday night when a furry four-legged customer with a big appetite arrived about 7:30 p.m. for some grub.
"I was working with my friend Jorja and there was a bear outside on our garbage can," Lawrance.
She and co-worker Jorja Threlsall tried to close the door but decided to seek refuge behind the pizza racks as the black bear ripped apart the garbage can in front of them.
While they wondered whether the curious critter was going to cross their threshold, suddenly it wandered into the store to another garbage can inside.
But it turned out, it wasn't the garbage can it wanted after all.
This bear had its eye on the pie.
"It decided to climb on the counter and put its arms up and steal the pizza and started to eat it," Lawrance said, adding it could only get its front of its body up because it couldn't quite get a grip on the stainless steel.
A native of B.C., Lawrance said she is used to seeing bears -- just not those that prefer in-store dining.
"It was kind of freaky," she said.
"Our first thought was to scare it out."
The girls moved behind the door to hide while about 20 spectators outside started snapping pictures and taking video of the hungry bear.
But this unexpected visitor had a bear-size case of the munchies.
Lawrance was washing dishes at Fat Tony's Pizza in Whistler, B.C. Monday night when a furry four-legged customer with a big appetite arrived about 7:30 p.m. for some grub.
"I was working with my friend Jorja and there was a bear outside on our garbage can," Lawrance.
She and co-worker Jorja Threlsall tried to close the door but decided to seek refuge behind the pizza racks as the black bear ripped apart the garbage can in front of them.
While they wondered whether the curious critter was going to cross their threshold, suddenly it wandered into the store to another garbage can inside.
But it turned out, it wasn't the garbage can it wanted after all.
This bear had its eye on the pie.
"It decided to climb on the counter and put its arms up and steal the pizza and started to eat it," Lawrance said, adding it could only get its front of its body up because it couldn't quite get a grip on the stainless steel.
A native of B.C., Lawrance said she is used to seeing bears -- just not those that prefer in-store dining.
"It was kind of freaky," she said.
"Our first thought was to scare it out."
The girls moved behind the door to hide while about 20 spectators outside started snapping pictures and taking video of the hungry bear.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
2000 Nissan S15 Silvia Spec R - The Instant Gentleman
Unique Styling is Everything with Super Made.
Styles come and go, but nowhere does the statement hold truer than in the world of drifting. Every other week, a new trend is born; that new style becomes distinctive, but having said that, those ideas don’t always stick. Innovations don’t come easy and getting your peers to accept trends can be tough—just ask Takanori Yoshida. From his workshop at Super Made in Osaka, Japan, he’s created some of the most distinct drift cars their country has ever seen. A couple years back in was his SR20-powered Y34 Gloria; this year, at the Tokyo Auto Salon, he rolled in with the "Instant Gentleman" S15 Silvia, running with, of all things, undersized 15-inch wheels. Needless to say, the drift community went B-A-N-A-N-A-S. So what sets Yoshida-san’s style apart from the rest? We hopped on an Osaka-bound shinkansen to find out.
As Yoshida tells us, there are two basic prerequisites that a dorisha (drift car) needs to satisfy if it’s going to be classified as "cool." Stance and, most importantly, offset. Making the car sit right is key but on this Silvia, he came with a slightly different approach. Staying true to the roots of drifting is something that Super Made strives to do; even their D1 Grand Prix Onevia shows a very different style from all the pro-drift cars on the circuit. They keep it simple, and most of all, cheap. This is what led Yoshida to convert his S15’s hubs to that of the 4-lug off a S13. This conversion now allows him to use smaller diameter wheels, the added bonus being that he can pick from a wide variety of old school kicks (wheels), like the set of Work Equip 03s he’s on now. Well, that, and now money can be more well spent on tires for drifting.
The fat sidewalls work on the S15, making it instantly recognizable as a dorisha, also thanks to the Instant Gentleman aero that’s fitted onto the body. The low-slung front bumper is made to sit even closer to the ground thanks to a pair of side-under canards while a series of openings were cut out to help increase airflow to the engine. The wide front fenders feature an AMG Benz-inspired vent which reveals the red candy paint that the front section of the chassis has been painted with. Deeper profiled side-skirts are joined by Super Made underskirts, which mimic the front canards to help make the car seem even lower. Yoshida picked Origin rear overfenders to pump the car’s rear width and made sure they were a perfect match to the -10 offset of the Equip wheels. The Instant Gentleman lightweight trunk lid and lip spoiler help create a very distinctive rear end, matching the lines of the rear bumper, which are fitted with Super Made under spoilers. A final exterior touch is a 326 Power roof spoiler.Yoshida spends all his free time drifting, either at night on deserted roads or at track events, so the S15’s suspension has plenty of upgrades. It’s super low and looks super sick, all thanks to a fully adjustable 326 Power damper kit that uses ultra stiff springs and camber plates to tune the front wheels with an extra serving of negative camber. Super Made installed their own steering knuckles to increase steering angle, then added tension rods and stiffer bushings to really tighten up the entire driving feel. The smaller wheels, unfortunately, don’t allow for a big brake upgrade, so the stock brakes were simply upgraded with slotted Apex rotors and Project Mu brake pads.
The engine comes next, and while it’s pumping out a modest 400hp, it wasn’t just bolting on a bigger turbo and calling it a day. No, with a drift car, it’s wise to strengthen it for high revving/rev-limiter-bouncing abuse. The SR20DET’s head was pulled so a HKS Step 2 upgrade with valve springs, retainers and specially coated rockers arms could be installed. Yoshida kept the stock cams for better response in lower rpm, but a nice T518Z-10 from Trust was bolted on, which, at 1.5-bar, spools up quick, adding torque in the midrange. The exhaust is extremely free-flowing now as a full Super Made exhaust leads from the front pipe down to the muffler, not a catalytic converter in sight. Yoshida was able to save more scratch by picking up a used Blitz intercooler off Yahoo.jp’s auction site, which allowed him to invest wisely in a NISMO fuel pump and 800cc SARD injectors. An A’PEXi Power FC is used to keep everything running smoothly, making full use of the engine’s available potential. With the rigors of drifting inevitable, the drivetrain needed an upgrade as well, so an Exedy single-plate clutch and 2-way ATS limited slip differential were installed. 
Opening the driver side door reveals a very subtly tuned interior with only drift-car essentials. The stock driver’s seat has been wisely removed for a Bride Zeta II to hold Yoshida tightly in place when tackling corners sideways. The steering wheel is another Yahoo auctions score, a deeply cupped, Alcantara-wrapped piece that we wouldn’t mind having ourselves. No need for gauges every which way you look; an A’PEXi Power FC Commander and a Blitz boost controller are all Yoshida needs to tap into his SR20. The Blitz boost controller is within easy sight mounted atop the steering column and happens to doubles up as a boost gauge.It’s been Super Made’s on-going battle to keep drifting close to its roots, yet it has also helped them to spawn their unique style while doing so. True, the styles do come and go, but Super Made is going to make sure they’re on top of what’s hot.
From the September, 2011 issue of Super Street
By Dino Dalle Carbonare
Jokes!!!
Little Johnny walked into his dad's bedroom one day only catch him sitting on the side of his bed sliding on a condom. Johnny's father, in attempt to hide his full erection with a condom on it, bent over as if to look under the bed. Little Johnny asked curiously "What ya doin dad?" His father quickly replied, "I thought I saw a rat go underneath the bed, to which Little Johnny replied "What ya gonna do, fuck him?"
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Drunken tractor joyride lands man in jail
SARNIA, Ont. - A drunk driver with four prior convictions got nearly two years of jail time for his erratic actions behind the wheel of a farm tractor.
Jeffrey Kerr, 49, who had previously pleaded guilty to impaired driving, dangerous driving and driving while disqualified, was in court once again Tuesday in the southwestern Ont. city of Sarnia.
Kerr forced other vehicles off the road when he went on a joyride June 18, 2010. He was swerving from one side of the road to the other, then went into the ditch and apparently passed out but returned to the road with a beer in his hand.
A victim impact statement from one driver stated an area family could have lost a loved one due to the risk posed by Kerr.
Police arrived to find Kerr driving in the middle of the road until they managed to get him to pull over.
In addition to the open beer, there were six empties on the tractor.
Kerr’s speech was incomprehensible except for saying something about watering cows.
Breath samples showed his blood-alcohol level was more than twice the legal limit.
It was Kerr’s fifth conviction for a drinking and driving offence.
His last conviction was in 2005, and he never completed the required remedial course to regain his driver’s licence.
Judge Deborah Austin said the repeated offences, along with the aggravating features of the recent offence, created the potential for a significant jail sentence.
Following the 20-month jail sentence, Kerr will be on a year’s probation when he must take substance-abuse counselling.
He also got a 10-year driving ban.
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2011/09/28/18752886.html
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Jokes!!!
Gary and Mary go on their honeymoon, and Gary spends six hours of the honeymoon night eating Mary's pussy. The next afternoon, they go to an Italian restaurant. Suddenly, Gary starts to freak out. He screams, "Waiter! Waiter! Come over here!"
The waiter says, "Can I help you, sir?" Gary yells, "There's a hair in my spaghetti! Get it the fuck out of here!" The waiter apologizes up and down as he quickly takes the spaghetti away. Mary looks over at Gary, and shaking her head, she whispers, "What a hypocrite you are. You spent most of last night with your face full of hair." Gary says, "Yeah? Well, how long do you think I'd have stayed if I found a piece of spaghetti in there?"
Monday, September 26, 2011
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